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National LamParry’s Christmas Vacation, And A Few Other Movie Worthy Christmas Tales

MERRY CHRISTMAS! It truly is the best time of the year, isn’t it? The holidays always bring so much happiness and some of the greatest memories. Whether they’re awesome gifts, hilarious relatives, or random unforeseen chaos. I’ve compiled some of my family’s all time greatest stories for you to enjoy on this Christmas day!

The Gift Of A Lifetime

Kayla and I were in high school (she was a senior and I was a sophomore), it was Christmas morning, and we were opening presents in our jammies. We each opened our gifts and the last one was a big box addressed to the both of us.

Great, we were going to have to share something…that was code for it was hers and I got to use it only when she didn’t want/need it…its her world, I’m just livin in it.

We opened the big box and found a bunch of beach towels on top…confused; we pulled them out to find sunscreen…still confused; we kept digging through beach supplies to find a note at the bottom. We still hadn’t put the pieces together at this point so we proceeded to read the note that read:

“Merry Christmas, Girls! Pack your bags, we’re leaving at 5:00 AM tomorrow morning to go to Fort Myers Beach, Florida for the week!”

Woohoo! We didn’t have to share anything AND we got to go on vacay with the fam bam?!

BEST. GIFT. EVER.

Anyone who has seen that Mary Kate and Ashley movie (I think it’s called Holiday In The Sun) where their parents pull them out of school to go to the Bahamas, opening this gift felt like that. We thought we were SO cool.

Christmas Tree Timber

Kayla and I got a Yorkshire Terrier on Easter when I was four and she was six. His name was Max and he was the cutest little five-pound ball of fur you could ever imagine.

He Loved treats, as most dogs do; however, he would never just eat them right out of the shoot. We would give him a treat, he would go “bury” it somewhere in the house, come bark at you until you found it for him and gave him the treat again.

Typically it was sitting right on the seat of the couch.

Unless it was Christmas…during the holidays he would hide his treats in the tree skirt.

One day we were out running errands and came home to our tree lying on the ground.

Somehow our little five pound bundle of joy managed to knock over our 7-foot tall Christmas tree all by himself…

Thankfully only a few ornaments broke and Max was totally fine…he pooped on the floor but hey I probably would have too if I were his size and a tree that big were coming down near me lol.

Christmas Family Vacay

I grew up with both sets of grandparents living less than 10 minutes away, so needless to say we’ve always spent a lot of time together. This is something I will be forever grateful for.

This is also something that has made for some hilarious memories over the years.

Last year, we decided to go on a trip to Florida for Christmas with the whole gang. This includes my mom, dad, sister, Grandma Donna (my mom’s mom) and her husband Tom (not technically my blood grandpa but he’s basically my grandpa), my dads parents Ralph and Rosie, and my dad’s brother Kent (formerly known as Santa if you read about the Christmas party a few weeks ago.)

Now, mind you, all of my grandparents are 75-85 years old and Uncle Kent hasn’t traveled in years.

Grandma Rosie had asked my mom numerous times leading up to the trip if she needed to bring her winter coat. My mom tried to explain that we would be on the beach in Florida and it would be sunny and warm; however, she was set on bringing her coat just in case.

We show up at the airport at 5:00AM on departure day and the coat is along for the ride.

We checked our bags, got all of our carry on bags assigned so everyone knew exactly what they were responsible for, Grandma Rosie was designated to carry her coat and that was all.

Airport security was sure to throw everyone for a loop.

Grandpa Ralph has a defibrillator and pacemaker, so he had to get special treatment that he didn’t quite understand.

Uncle Kent brought an entire tube of toothpaste and didn’t understand why that wasn’t allowed, although it was much larger than the 3oz limit that my dad told him about many times.

Lastly, Grandma Rosie was flagged for a random search and couldn’t understand why or what was happening with that either.

Finally, we make it through with only a few less items than we started with – Kent was just going to have to buy new toothpaste when we arrived no matter whom he complained to about it being confiscated.

Next stop: Atlanta airport.

We make it to the gate, get everyone a snack and drink for the flight, and the plane finally arrives.

Boarding the plane went surprisingly smooth…until we all got settled.

Grandma Rosie can’t find her coat.

The one thing we left her in charge of she forgot at the gate and the door was closed.

To the front of the plane my dad goes to talk to the flight attendant.

I still don’t know how he managed, but he got the flight attendant to open the door and go out to the gate to retrieve the completely unnecessary item.

By some miracle, we make it down there in one piece and had an absolute BLAST.

Every day was spent on the beach, soaking up the sunshine.

Grandma Donna has very fair skin.

However, she can’t ever seem to remember to put on her sunscreen, and she refuses to sit under an umbrella, until she has fried her skin.

To no one’s surprise, this happened almost every day.

There is nothing in the world better than spending quality time with the ones you Love most.

Especially when you decide to take everyone jet skiing…

My mom and sister are on one. (We all thought this would be the major issue because they fight like it’s nobody’s business – they really Love each other, just have clashing personalities…very clashing personalities)

I was paired with my dad.

Tom and Uncle Kent shared the last one.

My uncle Kent is very particular and likes everything to be just so. He wanted to stay completely dry and enjoy a smooth ride.

He gets on first, followed by Tom who climbs on back and proceeds to flip the jet ski and send Kent flying into the water.

Woopsie!!!

Take two: they get it all worked out this time and everyone gets a move on.

Tom loses his baseball hat to the wind as they flop across the waves in the rough water.

Kent is soaking and livid about the choppy waves and jumps off to swim to shore.

Meanwhile, all I can seem to do is panic that my dad’s going to flip me off and I’m going to be a shark’s lunch.

Thankfully that didn’t happen, but I can’t ever seem to break that fear no matter how many times I visit the ocean.

We all head back in and take a walk on the beach to debrief on all the chaos that just went down.

Half a mile down the way, and an hour and a half later, Tom’s hat washes up on shore woo!!!

Later that night we all crammed into one room to huddle around the TV and cheer on Naz during his basketball game.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, there are no words to describe the Love I have for my family. They are truly the most genuine, Loving, caring people you will ever meet. This was the trip of a lifetime and we created memories that I will cherish forever.

I could go on and on for days with hilarious family stories but I’ll let you get on with your Christmas Day for now. Please share with me some of your greatest holiday stories – I know you all have them and I Love a good laugh too!

I wish you all a very Merry Christmas!

-AP



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  1. Oh gosh Ashley, I loved this story. Too funny for sure. When my daughter and her husband bought this huge house in Maquoketa several years ago, we had a Lampoon Christmas Vacation. We all stayed over night at their house on Christmas Eve and each one of us was one of the characters in that movie. My poor brother was cousin Eddie, I was the hoity toity ol’ lady that walked around with a martini, my husband was Clark, and my mom was the ol’ lady that recited the Pledge of Allegiance at the table when she was asked to do the prayer. It was just a hoot. We had so much fun. Our grandkids thought we were all crazy, but that’s ok. LOL

    Continue to share your blogs. They are just fabulous.

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      Hahaha oh my gosh I Love it! I’m glad to hear you’ve enjoyed family time similar to mine, its always so much fun to laugh with everyone! Thank you so much for reading and supporting me! Hope you had a very Merry Christmas!

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